__aNgeL__

Young Casanova

By Benjamin Joseph D. Collado III
Inquirer
Last updated 00:38am (Mla time) 07/26/2006

Published on Page C1 of the July 26, 2006 issue of the Philippine Daily Inquirer
IT’S ABOUT WAKING UP IN THE morning with a bad hangover and being hit by a very familiar feeling that you went overboard again last night.
It’s about a one-night stand with a girl you met at a party, sneaking out of her room before she wakes, checking your things if something was missing, looking for her phone and purposely deleting your number from her phonebook.
It’s about meeting a girl at a bar and offering her a ride home. It’s about asking her if she wanted to go someplace private so you can talk–when both of you are aware that you have a different “talk” in mind.
It’s about meeting your ex again after quite some time and noting how much better she looks now than she did before. It’s about pushing the right buttons for her to give in. And finding yourself in bed with her without strings attached, all the while being grateful to your friend who told you it’s good not to burn your bridges with your exes.
It’s about seeing a girl and finding ways for you to meet her. With pickup lines being overused, you have a better chance of getting her number by having a friend go over and ask her politely if he can have his friend over there introduced to her. It’s about texting with her the whole day, getting to know her, showing that you have a genuine interest in her, sharing sweet nothings on the phone and forwarding her cheesy quotes that work almost all the time.
It’s about having your friend, your partner-in-crime, the Robin to your Batman–or whatever you want to call him–validate to her all your pledges of devotion and loyalty.
It’s about perfecting the art of lying. Telling your girlfriend it was just you and the boys last night–go ask Robin. And not bothering to tell Robin what to say because he already knows the routine.
It’s about keeping your girlfriend happy. Giving her gifts and surprises so she won’t suspect your wayward ways.
It’s about not caring if your girlfriend broke up with you because she caught you cheating. There are other fish in the sea, you say. You’re better off a free man, free to do anything you pleased without worrying about getting caught.
It’s about asking the girl you just met out for a date. Convincing her that you’re for real. Making her forget about the warnings her friends gave about you.
It’s about doing anything so you can bring her home tonight. And if everything else fails, it’s always a good idea to have a plan B.
It’s about saying the L word without breaking eye contact. Making her believe that you really mean it and that you’re starting to fall for her. That’s plan B.
It’s about thinking of ways to break up with her if she starts to get clingy. Thinking of the standard breakup lines and wondering if she’ll buy it.
It’s about rushing to your friend’s girlfriend with a shoulder to cry on. Telling her that everything’s gonna work out fine. Comforting her one minute, making out the next.
It’s about going out with your friends and partying all night. Drinking till dawn and playing around with girls.
It’s about waking up in the morning with a bad case of hangover and a very familiar feeling that you went overboard again last night.
Deja vu.
Ugly cycle
It really is an ugly cycle. After years of a life like this, you begin to ask yourself if there is more to life than drinking all night and finding someone to hook up with. And in the morning when you wake up, no matter how much you soap yourself, you still have this uneasy feeling that you’re still dirty.
Your friend has found a girl that he’s serious about. When you go out with your friends, you find him taking a raincheck because he has to spend time with his girl. You and your friends wonder what has gotten into him. You even wonder if he’s lost his mind. How can he even think about trading this kind of life? There’s nothing better than a bachelor’s life.
It’s all fun and games the first few years. But after a while, you look at yourself in the mirror and find the traces of abuse you did to yourself. And if you don’t change your ways, you fear that maybe someday you’ll find yourself alone and lonely.
And after all the years of booze and girls, you can finally sum up your life in one word–empty.
Maybe it’s not good to spend your life that way. Maybe your friend hasn’t lost his mind, after all.
What you need is to find someone who can make you look forward to another day. Someone who, when you think about her, never fails to put a smile on your face.
Someone who makes you want to be a better man–to steal a line from pareng Jack Nicholson.
Someone who fills that emptiness in you, making you complete.
Before, when you used to wake up in the morning and find somebody in your arms, your first thought was how you could get rid of her without hurting her feelings. But now, what you need is a girl who makes you want to think of reasons and ways to let her stay in your arms.
Because when she’s right there beside you, it is as if everything’s okay. That nothing else matters but you and her.
You need somebody who makes you miss her so much that you buy a bottle of her perfume and spray it on your pillows so, when you go to bed at night, you can hug the pillow with her scent on it and wish that it was really her you were hugging.
You need somebody who makes your heart skip a beat when she smiles at you. Who makes you feel so comfortable and safe that you pour out your heart to her, unburdening secrets that you’ve kept for a long time. And having her tell you that it’s okay, you have a new slate now, that you can leave everything where it belongs, in the past, and concentrate on what lies ahead of you.
You need someone who makes you listen more to love songs on the radio. Someone whom you pray for at night before you sleep. Someone you wish you’d dream about, for even while you sleep, you still want to be with her.
Someone whom you can finally look in the eye, without all the guilt and deceit, and tell her you love her. And you get this mushy feeling inside that tells you it’s true. You want to shout over the rooftops, you love her, and she loves you! There’s no better feeling in the world.
I have found my someone. I have found my all. I’ve been wanting to ask this for a long time now. And I think there’s no better timing than now.
So here I am, down on one knee, asking you, my someone. Will you marry me?

A Soulful Relationship
> by Rev. Ronald McFadden
>
> If you’re not married yet, share this with a friend. If you are
married,
> share it with your spouse or other married couples and reflect on it.
>
> An African proverb states, “Before you get married, keep both eyes
open,
> and after you marry, close one eye.” Before you get involve and make
a
> commitment to someone, don’t let lust, desperation, immaturity,
ignorance,
> pressure from others or a low self-esteem, make you blind to warning
> signs.Keep your eyes open, and don’t fool yourself that you can
change
> someone or that what you see as faults aren’t really important.
>
> Once you decide to commit to someone, over time his or her flaws,
> vulnerabilities, pet peeves, and differences will become more
obvious. If
> you love your mate and want the relationship to grow and evolve,
you’ve
> got to learn to close one eye and not let every little thing bother
you.
> You and your mate have many different expectations, emotional needs,
> values, dreams, weaknesses, and strengths. You are two unique
individual
> children of God who have decided to share a life together.
>
> Neither of you are perfect, but are you perfect for each other? Do
you
> bring out the best in each other? Do you compliment and compromise
with
> each other, or do you compete, compare, and control? What do you
bring to
> the relationship?
>
> Do you bring past relationships, past hurt, past mistrust, past pain?
You
> can’t take someone to the altar to alter him or her. You can’t make
> someone love you or make someone stay. If you develop self-esteem,
> spiritual discernment, and “a life”, you won’t find yourself making
> someone else responsible for your happiness or responsible for your
pain.
>
> Manipulation, control, jealousy, neediness, andselfishness are not
the
> ingredients of a thriving, healthy, loving and lasti ng relationship!
>
> Seeking status, sex, wealth, and security are the wrong reasons to be
in a
> relationship.
>
> What keeps a relationship strong? Communication, intimacy, trust, a
sense
> of humor,sharing household tasks, some getaway time without business
or
> children and daily exchanges (a meal, shared activity, a hug, a call,
a
> touch, a note). Leave a nice message on the voicemail or send a nice
> email. Sharing common goals and interests.Growth is important. Grow
> together, not away from each other, giving each other space to grow
> without feeling insecure. Allow your mate to have outside interests.
You
> can’t always be together. Give each other a sense of belonging a! nd
> assurances of commitment. Don’t try to control one another. Learn
each
> other’s family situation. Respect his or her parents regardless.
Don’t put
> pressure on each other for material goods. Remember for richer or for
> poorer.
>
> If these qualities are missing, the relationship will erode as
resentment,
> withdrawal, abuse, neglect, dishonesty, and pain replace the passion.
The
> difference between ‘United’ and ‘Untied’ is where you put the I.

It’s true when they say that it’s hard to have a
high-fulfilling career and keeping your family at the same time. Now
thatI’m a working mom, life has been a challenge for me eversince. I
learned a lot everyday and I want to share some of ‘em here:
Life is indeed full of complexities. But in my life I can be
who I want to be. Life doesn’t really restrict me from doing things
that I want to accomplish or to abandon. There can never be right or wrong,
only the situation and the timing will define it. I can love unendingly even
if I keep hurting. I can sacrifice comfort just to experience what is
uncertain
and feel pain and danger. I can simultaneously feel happy and sad. Who
said both can’t be achieved at the same time? Tears and laughter together
make me
more of a human. The mixture of emotions and feelings will entitle the
very humane side of me. it’s funny coz I remember once I thought that if
life is
a drama, I want to be the actor… I would be able to share my
thoughts, display my emotion, interpret my lines, and ultimately, to move people.
God is my director, and with his guidance, I’d be able to come up with a
very good presentation. I may stutter or forget my lines, but I’ll be able
to make up on my next performance. Mistakes can be inevitable, what is
important is to learn from it, and LEARN from it. Preparation can be
hard,time and effort-taking; but will there be more satisfying than to liven up
your own piece? In the end, some may weep base on how they interpret my
story or piece, some may laugh, some may feel indifference, some may
exhibit sarcasm. The audience’s expressions and responses doesn’t really bother
me.
What is important, to sum it all, is that I was able to dab at their
emotionality, may it be cold or accommodating. I may not entice
positivity from the pessimists, I may not add inspiration to the optimists, but
surely,
I stole their attention even for a second.
To sum this all up, I only want one thing: In this life I
want to be remembered as someone who stood by no matter what life takes
on me. My personal value cannot be determined by my achievements but by
the number of people who celebrates with me because of that achievement. My
failures can never make me less of a person but will boost my worth
because of the people who cry with me. Success is nothing at all with people
weeping because of it. And failure is more hurting with people rejoicing over
it. To my friends, don’t think that you lose because someone wins, or vice
versa……
I really can’t imagine how life can be without people who
never cease believing in whatever I can do and never stop pushing what
I still can do. In the process, they still are the same people who tell
me to quit when needed and resume when necessary. They are those people who
celebrate with me when I am hailed as a victor and tap my shoulders and
say “hey, you’re never alone” when I fail. With their overwhelming support
I realize that failure doesn’t really make me weak but strengthens my
defenses against what is to come. So that next time, I’ll take it one at a time,
and then learn from my mistakes. And whatever happens, I am not alone,
NEVER.
THEN I CAN SAY THAT I HAVE LIVED LIFE TO THE FULLEST!

My company slogan says “It’s easier. Enjoy.”
I will always carry this line with me…
because it’s true, indeed.. Because I enjoy life, and it becomes easy.

I don’t know why I suddenly wanna write something about MY ANGEL! Maybe
I
was just inspired by THE NOTEBOOK MOVIE I saw on HBO last night *hihi*
or
maybe because for me what I will tell here now is very special so I
wanted
to share this with each and everyone… *wink*

CHARLES DANDY M. LLANES, whoah! whoever thought we’ll end up together?
It
wasn’t really a love at first sight thing but well… who wouldn’t fall
in
love with such a wonderful guy like him??? well, let me go ahead and
start
OUR STORY…

I met Charles during Navotas CONCERT dated April 26, 2003. I was a
trainee
then at YESFM where he happen to be the Events coordinator / Internship
Supervisor. He was really masungit and kinda show-off then and the
funny
thing is, I really don’t have an idea that I’ll fall for him because of
two
reasons: FIRST, I don’t like him the first time and SECOND: He’s TAKEN
that
time… YES, he had a 6-year relationship with a girl whom everybody
thought
he’d marry (not until he met me, *wink*wink*).

It took 5 days for us to see each other again after that concert. That
was
May 1, 2003…It was because of the Annual Aliwan Fiesta that made us
see
each other again. I was originally assigned to do the field survey but
due
to the said event, YESFM needed a lot of trainees to do some work…
During
lunch, he sat beside me, he began to make kwento of almost about
anything…
we shared lots of funny stuffs together with the other trainees…

Then we had the time to be alone…YES… only the two of us…We were
smoking in the Star City’s Lobby. It’s funny because I remember that
our
topic was all about his EX— Ironic isn’t it? And I can perfectly
remember
how proud he was when he was talking about her and I can’t help but to
say
to myself that the girl he loved back then, was indeed LUCKY to have
him..

===ENOUGH FOR IT, OUCH!!!===

After we talked that day (May 1, 2003) I don’t exactly know what’s in
me but
I felt I liked him that time… but there’s always something holding me
back. The thought of him having a long-term girlfriend made me realize
that
it’s just not meant to be… Friends is all that we can ever be…

After the Aliwan Fiesta, I went back to the office to get my Completion
Form. That was the he asked for my #. He asked me out but I refused at
first
but he insisted and eventually I accepted his offer and YES, we went
out to
our first date at SM NORTH EDSA, we watched THE MATRIX 2, Cinema 6.
After
that, we hang up in a bar and had laughters and endless kwento all
night
long.

That night, it was confirmed =) BOOM! I love him! I know that ot was
too
soon to say at that time at is was CRAZY because he’s taken! But there
are
things that I can’t explain but I know exactly it’s for real… God
knows
how hard I tried to fight how i feel for him but things just went
uncontrollable at that time.. From that day on, WE WERE INSEPARABLE…
=)

May 18, 2003, we had an event in PAMPANGA. We prayed together at GOOD
SHEPHERD CHAPEL in BULAON, PAMPANGA. We asked God to guide us and to
show us
a sign if things are worth risking for. We hope that if it’s really
meant to
be, things will fall into it’s place.

Well God is really wise and powerful. Our love story had lots of twists
and
turns… We broke hearts along the way, there was no easy way for us at
that
time so there were persons whom we’ve hurt , but that’s inevitable. But
hey,
we’re able to surpass everything…OUR LOVE ALONE SUFFICE =)

Now that we’re MARRIED (June 15, 2004) we have our little angel named
Cedd
Angelo Nino —a wonderful baby boy. We knew we couldn’t ask for more.
God
already gave us more than what we’ve wished and prayed for.

TO YOU MY ANGEL CHARLES:
Thanks for everything!
I have lots of things to say sorry for—
can I pay for it forever?

TO MY ANGEL CEDD:
You’re truly a heaven sent!

BY:
EDENNE CARIAGA -LLANES
10-JANUARY-2006

at first you didn’t lift your head;
you didn’t know how to smile.
The time before you knew my voice
seemed such a long, long while.
I couldn’t wait for you to roll,
and then to sit and clap.
And now you’re off and crawling,
not helpless in my lap.
Why didn’t someone tell me
how fast a baby grows,
That every little stage
soon comes, but sooner goes.
So i’ll enjoy the fleeting time
before you learn to walk
and treasure every tiny noise
before you learn to talk..
for soon you’ll learn to walk,
then run,
and talk and sing a song
and never be my baby again,
The baby’s forever gone.
Little baby, take your time,
For while you’re tiny.. you are mine